The פסוק says – "ויאמר אברהם אל עבדו זקן ביתו המשל בכל אשר לו שים נא את ידך תחת ירכי. ואשביעך בה'... לא תקח אשה לבני מבנות הכנעני.... כי אל ארצי ואל מולדתי תלך
(כ"ד, ב'-ד').
Eliezer was אברהם’s closet Talmid. He was a great צדיק himself and was trusted to manage אברהם’s entire estate so why did אברהם make אליעזר take such a serious oath of "שים נא ידך תחת ירכי"? אברהם insisted that יצחק not marry a girl from כנען, not even אליעזר’s daughter who grew up under the influence of אברהם אבינו and שרה אימנו since she descended from כנען.
Why was אברהם more willing for יצחק to marry a girl who grew up amongst the influence of עבודה זרה rather than אליעזר’s daughter who was the top בית יעקב girl of the generation who’s father was a big צדיק, a תלמיד of אברהם אבינו? She grew up under the influence and chinuch of אברהם אבינו and שרה אימנו!
The Vilna Gaon writes in the beginning of his ספר – אבן שלמה that all of עבודת ה' is dependent on תקון המדות. He writes that the source of all sins come from bad מדות. He continues and says that the main purpose of life is to constantly break and overcome your bad מדות and if you don’t, there is no purpose to live. A person can be the greatest תלמיד חכם but if he has bad מדות he has no purpose of living.
When רבקה told יעקב to run away from עשו, she told יצחק – קצתי בחיי מפני בנות חת אם לקח יעקב אשה מבנות חת כאלה מבנות הארץ למה לי חיים (בראשית כ"ז, מ"ו). רבקה said that if יעקב marries from the בנות כנען, life isn’t worth anything. The nation of כנען represents bad מדות. כנען descends from חם who did a terrible act to his father because of his bad מדות. These bad מדות of selfishness got ingrained into the nation of כנען.
רבקה understood that the purpose of life is to work on and perfect your מדות and if יעקב marries into כנען who is filled with bad מדות, there’s no purpose of living. This is a life or death decision that the future mother of כלל ישראל has sterling מדות.
אליעזר had to take a serious oath of "שים נא ידך תחת ירכי" since this decision was a matter of life or death. It says "דרך ארץ קדמה לתורה". A person with bad מדות, his תורה is worthless. A person must set aside time each day to work a perfecting his מדות.
A couple once came to Rav Moshe Feinstein traumatized after a certain mekubal told them something terrible was going to happen to a certain family member. Rav Moshe told them it’s totally שקר what the mekubal told them. Rav Moshe explained that a person only get’s a vision if Hashem comes to him. Hashem doesn’t come to a person who has bad מדות and a person who frightens a couple in such a way has terrible מדות. The purpose of marriage is תקון מדות. That is the purpose of תורה and that is the purpose of life!
The Teimani community in Eretz Yisrael mourns the petirah of the eldest Teimani Rav, Hagaon Harav Shlomo Korach, zt”l, Chief Rabbi of Bnei Brak.
Harav Korach was 84 at his petirah. He was unwell in recent months and was hospitalized in Yerushalayim’s Shaarei Zedek hospital, where he passed away early Monday.
He was born in Sanaa, Yemen. As a child he learned under the tutelage of Harav Chaim Salah, as well as his grandfather Harav Amram Korach, the last Rav of Yemenite Jewry.
His family moved to Eretz Yisrael in 5709/1949, settling in Yerushalayim. One of his sisters “disappeared” as did many of the Yemenite children who moved to Eretz Yisrael during those years.
Rav Shlomo learned in Yeshivas Mekor Chaim as well as Yeshivas Ohr Yisrael in Petach Tikva. In 5713/1953, he learned in Yeshivas Mercaz Harav in Yerushalayim, and later in Yeshivas Ponevez in Bnei Brak. He also spent some time in Lakewood, New Jersey, where he learned under Hagaon Harav Aharon Kotler, zt”l.
After he married, Rav Shlomo learned in the Ponevez kollel, and was later appointed as a Rav in Bnei Brak. He was the first Rav of Bnei Brak, as recognized by the Chief Rabbinate.
The Rav was one of the foremost Teimani Rabbanim; he wrote a number of sefarim on the minhagim and halachos of the Teimani community.
His levayah is to be held Monday afternoon from his beis medrash, Chanichei Hayeshivos, in Bnei Brak, proceeding from there to Yerushalayim, where he will be buried in the Sanhedria cemetery.
ANCIENT MUSIC NEW LIFE Zev Zalman (“Z.Z.”) Ludwick shares that one of the most meaningful facets of his job is bringing the voice of an old instrument back to life (Photos: Esky Cook)
Ludwick’s House of Violin as the name suggests is just that — violins everywhere (and a cello here and there) overtaking many a room of Zev Zalman (“Z.Z.”) and Sherrie Ludwick’s cozy home on a tucked-away side street in Silver Spring Maryland.
Z.Z. 53 the very unassuming multitalented heavy-metal rock star-turned-luthier/owner graciously welcomes us at the front door wearing a black baseball cap that covers his closely shaven head. His long salt-and-pepper beard would suit a rebbe or an aging rocker — take your pick — but not his long twirled Breslov peyos which fall to the top of his black work apron.
Unfinished Andrei Dinu violins made in Romania line the wall of Z.Z.’s showroom — a converted bedroom sporting whimsical curtains with musical staves and notes. After varnishing he will precisely plane the fingerboard to the appropriate arch cut the bridge and install the hardware and sound post. It takes between 250 to 300 hours to build a violin from scratch. Student instruments the cheapest violins he sells are priced at $1 300 to $2 000.
He’s been playing the violin since the age of eight though the bullies at school taunted him for his choice. “I was a little guy and carrying a violin was not the coolest thing in the world” recalls Z.Z.
At 16 Z.Z. started playing electric bass and joined a heavy-metal band when he was 19. After many years he got into acoustic music and played the mandolin and banjo in his popular band The Sinai Mountain Boys. They played Jewish Bluegrass concerts at the Kennedy Center and The Strathmore among other venues.
But lately — a reflection of his life in general — he’s turned to more chassidic numbers.
“I’ve been getting into Breslov music in the last six or seven years so I wanted to just immerse myself in violin” he says.
And with that Z.Z. picks up his own violin puts bow to strings and his story like his music begins to unfold.
Ice Water Challenge
Z.Z.’s baal teshuvah journey began in 1999 when he was 35 years old. Though he has a famous baal teshuvah brother — Rabbi Lazer Brody translator of The Garden of Emuna and author of other books — it wasn’t until Z.Z. was invited to Rabbi Brody’s son’s wedding that he got his first real taste of chassidish Yiddishkeit. (Rabbi Brody took his mother’s last name to honor and remember a family that was decimated by the Holocaust.)
“At the time I had long hair earrings and was on drugs but my nephew insisted that ‘Uncle Robbie’ come to the wedding ” he remembers. “So I promised I would be on my best behavior.”
The wedding took place on Lag B’omer so the night before Lazer his son and Z.Z. visited Meron and the Ari’s mikveh in Tzfas. “I didn’t even know what a mikveh was ” Z.Z. recalls. “When I went into the mikveh it was freezing cold. Someone said to me ‘You’re in trouble now! Whoever goes to the Ari’s mikveh becomes a baal teshuvah.’”
He calls that dunk in the mikveh an “amazing experience” and later during the sheva brachos he noted something special about chassidim a quality that he lacked at the time. “I noticed the joy they had ” he says.
He returned to the United States and a couple of months later his father died. That’s when he took stock and realized that if he didn’t change his ways and beat his drug and alcohol problems he’d be joining his father in Shamayim.
“I’m very proud of the miracle that I’ve been drug-sober for 12 years and alcohol-sober for almost seven years” he says. “I feel fantastic and my life has changed so much.”
Shortly after his father passed away he married his first wife the mother of his two daughters but they were divorced after three years. Shortly thereafter he married again and committed to the Breslov path.
His new wife Sherrie had no qualms about Z.Z. growing his beard and peyos. He started immersing himself in Rebbe Nachman’s books and going to Uman every Rosh Hashanah. He practices hisbodedus — going into the woods or into a room by himself to mediate and reflect — a daily conversation with Hashem.
“I didn’t even know what a mikveh was” Z.Z. recalls. “When I went into the mikveh it was freezing cold. Someone said to me ‘You’re in trouble now! Whoever goes to the Ari’s mikveh becomes a baal teshuvah’”
"As Breslov husbands we don’t come home and tell our wives our problems” notes Z.Z. “We are supposed to come home like a light to illuminate so why burden your spouse with your problems? I talk to Hashem and say ‘Hashem I can’t do these things by myself without You!’ This is how I gave up drugs and alcohol — cold turkey — without AA without NA.”
Z.Z. pauses to show a video of his latest annual trip to Rebbe Nachman’s kever in Uman the central-Ukraine city located between Kiev and Odessa.
“This is Motzaei Shabbos” Z.Z. says narrating above the blaring Jewish music and 40000 exuberant voices. “Look ” he points out “we have guys with black kippahs we have guys with no kippahs; we’ve got guys in dreadlocks… that’s Beri Weber singing... I’m showing you just some of the simchah… Here is my brother Lazer; here’s Rav Arush my brother’s rebbi giving me a brachah.”
Playing for Messiah
His basement workshop separated into two sections is where all the magic happens. On one side is a pile of instruments in their hard and soft cases awaiting repair; on the other his workbench and the tools he needs to build and restore violins and other stringed instruments.
“I really love working late at night so a lot of times during the day I find myself goofing off a little bit” admits Z.Z. who pipes in classical music as he works. “Baruch Hashem I have the luxury of going upstairs and learning a little Gemara in the middle of the day or practicing my violin. So I’ll work for an hour then do my own thing for a half-hour then come back downstairs to work some more — all through the day. Usually between 8 p.m. and 12:30 a.m. when my creative juices flow much more I come down to work. Some people call it Zen — I call it Zev!”
By Menachem Pines| OCTOBER 19, 2021 ALL CREDIT GOES TO Menachem Pines | AND THE MISHPACHA MAGAZINE
Mir Mashgiach Rav Binyamin Finkel extends an embrace to every Jew who wants to grow
Photos: Baruch Yaari
Ten years ago this week, the night after Rav Nosson Tzvi Finkel ztz”l passed away, I was inconsolable — and told as much to Rav Binyamin Finkel, today the beloved mashgiach of Yeshivas Mir, already then a prominent figure in the yeshivah with hundreds of adherents participating in his vaadim.
“I just can’t escape the feeling that had Rav Nosson Tzvi been healthy, our generation would have been given an even bigger gift,” I lamented to Rav Binyamin, a cousin by marriage and second-cousin by lineage to the Rosh Yeshivah who — despite being trapped in a pain-filled, Parkinson’s-riddled frame — displayed visionary leadership that grew the yeshivah into a massive Torah empire.
“You’re looking at it from a narrow, purely physical perspective,” Rav Binyamin chided me gently. “True, maybe had he been healthy he could have done more, maybe he could have disseminated more Torah, maybe there was something he wanted to do but was unable to, I really don’t know. But if we look at all that he did do, it’s clear that he never stopped short at anything. Who says that his limitations ever prevented him from fulfilling his ambitions? The midrash tells us that while a person shouldn’t use a broken vessel, HaKadosh Baruch Hu klei tashmisho shevurim [loosely, Hashem prefers to employ broken vessels]. Perhaps our generation merited a rosh yeshivah like him specifically because of his condition and not in spite of it.”
That’s Rav Binyamin, known throughout the Mir and beyond as “Binyamin Hatzaddik” — the man with infinite patience and understanding and a profound ability to reframe what looks like calamity and turn it into signs of Divine love.
Years before, when Rav Binyamin was, according to his own self-definition, just a “regular avreich,” he’d gotten an offer for a position outside the yeshivah and didn’t know whether to take it or not: It was prestigious in and of itself and would also be a good springboard for the future. He decided to ask his rosh yeshivah, Rav Nosson Tzvi. Rav Nosson Tzvi told Rav Binyamin to go ask his own father, Rav Aryeh Finkel ztz”l, rosh yeshivah of Mir-Brachfeld. Rav Aryeh, however, put the decision back in his cousin Rav Nosson Tzvi’s court. “You’re an avreich in Mir, and he’s your rosh yeshivah,” Rav Aryeh told his son. “Yes, but Rav Nosson Tzvi told me to ask you, as you’re my father,” Rav Binyamin replied. “Go back and ask your rosh yeshivah,” his father insisted.
Rav Nosson Tzvi gave a wise answer that made clear his position but also made sure Rav Aryeh had the last word: “If your father tells you to stay here in the Mir,” said Rav Nosson Tzvi, “then I’ll be happy. If he says to take the position, I won’t interfere.”
Years later, when the yeshivah was experiencing severe financial difficulties, Rav Binyamin — who was at that time on the yeshivah payroll, giving shiur and vaadim — was seen in the line of people waiting to see Rosh Yeshivah Rav Nosson Tzvi. While most of the young men were asking about their monthly stipend, and some were asking for a raise, Rav Binyamin had a different request: “I know the situation now,” he told Rav Nosson Tzvi, “so I want a pay cut.”
This is Rav Binyamin Hatzaddik. Shabsi Binyamin Finkel, son of Rav Aryeh, son of Rav Chaim Zev, son of Rav Eliezer Yehudah, son of Rav Nosson Tzvi Finkel — ben achar ben, eldest after eldest, of the Alter of Slabodka, zy”a. And all he desires is one thing: to be able to teach and learn Torah with love.
(The Alter’s other son, Avraham Shmuel, was the father of Eliyahu Meir, who was the father of Rav Nosson Tzvi. Meanwhile, Rav Eliezer Yehudah’s second son, Rosh Yeshivah Rav Beinish, took Rav Nosson Tzvi for a son-in-law. If you draw a chart, you’ll see how Rav Nosson Tzvi and Rav Binyamin are second cousins once removed, as well as first cousins once removed via Rav Nosson Tzvi’s wife. It’s interesting to note that in many yeshivah dynasties, the position of rosh yeshivah is passed down directly along the family line, whereas in Mir, both lines defer to each other and have utmost regard for each other, each rosh yeshivah embracing the other.)
Last December, at the levayah of longtime Mir mashgiach Rav Aharon Chodosh (a brother-in-law of Rav Aryeh Finkel), who served in the position for over 55 years, it was announced that Rav Binyamin Finkel had been appointed as Mir’s new mashgiach. That means he’s officially in charge of the spiritual well-being of thousands of bochurim.
It was a most fitting choice. Many years ago, a popular rav agreed to deliver a lecture in a secular town in Israel. Then, when the date approached, he realized he had another commitment. In desperation, he turned to Rav Binyamin Finkel, who happily agreed to take his place. (He knew Rav Binyamin wouldn’t refuse — Binyamin Hatzaddik had a reputation for picking up and going any place he was invited in order to teach Torah, no matter what size the crowd.)
Rav Finkel traveled to the distant town and arrived at the designated address, but even after repeated knocking, there was no answer. Finally, a pajama-clad gentleman opened the door and shamefacedly admitted that he had forgotten to arrange the lecture, and no one was there.
Rav Binyamin smiled and said, “My friend, learning Torah with you is as valuable to me as teaching Torah to 50 people. I would be happy to learn with you, if you’re interested.”
The visitor was welcomed in and he sat down to learn with the host and the host’s son, who came to join them.
Twenty years later, a young man stopped Rav Binyamin in yeshivah and introduced himself. He was the son of that man, and he had been so impressed by the conduct of the visitor and the learning on that night, that he had been drawn to Torah.
Now that Rav Binyamin has taken his place in the exalted line of Mirrer mashgichim, who can better inspire thousands of talmidim in the biggest yeshivah in the world than a rebbi who is happy to teach one person at a time?
Chocolate Therapy
I was once davening in Rav Binyamin’s minyan when a young boy approached him and asked if he could put on tefillin for the first time there. The Mashgiach, of course, gracefully agreed.
After davening, they entered the Mashgiach’s room — and for a few moments, there was nothing except this boy, sitting and listening to a Yid with a whitening beard, who was speaking to him eye to eye with all the time in the world. Gesturing with his expressive hands, he told the boy about his own childhood struggles, explained how to know who’s a good friend and who to stay away from, and urged him not to get drawn to places that would disrupt his spiritual growth.
After he taught the young fellow how to pack away his new tefillin properly, he took a chocolate bar out of the nearby cupboard. But this was no random snack. Rav Binyamin Finkel prefers to distribute this particular brand, as it’s made of a high percentage of pure chocolate and thus incurs no questions about the proper brachah. He then asked the boy how many siblings he has and gave him a chocolate for each one. “And this is for your father and mother,” he said. “For when they have a coffee together.”
Over the years, in fact, this “chocolate bar therapy” has done wonders. “Once,” the Mashgiach told me, “I gave it to an avreich, and I told him that it is for when he and his wife sit down to have coffee. He went home and scheduled a special time to sit and drink coffee with his wife. After all, the Mashgiach had told him he had to! Sitting there together, they began to speak about things that somehow always got ignored in juggling the pressures of busy daily life. It was the start of a change for the better in their communication and relationship.”
If one bar of chocolate can get a couple to sit down for a conversation, it’s a good reason to keep his pantry well-stocked.
The avreichim sitting around Reb Binyamin Finkel at the “Sunday vaad” will often hear similar words about destressing the home environment. “My brothers and friends, the bnei aliyah,” he says to this crowd of young men whose welfare he so obviously cares about, “there are many children who, unfortunately, did not follow the path that the parents wanted, and one of the reasons is that they saw Shabbos and Yom Tov as a source of tension and pressure. We need to convey love for the mitzvos in our homes, so that there’s always a pleasant atmosphere.”
Then he adds, a bit more subtly, “But even as we focus on the warmth and the positivity, we must be careful not to make light of halachah. When we find that balance, when our children see the yiras Shamayim together with sweetness, with a feeling of ‘Ashreinu mah tov chelkeinu,’ when a father tells his children, ‘baruch Hashem we are Yidden!’ — and no, that doesn’t mean this is easy, but that we are happy to make the effort for the sake of kevod Shamayim — then that’s the best thing a child can absorb.”
During the early days of Covid, many desperate avreichim consulted with him. The restrictions were so onerous and conditions so severe that some felt like their young families were falling apart.
I admit, I was one of the complainers, but Rav Binyamin urged me to see things positively. “You have to know,” he told me, “that Hashem is making it turbulent so that we can come to the great tikkun. It’s important to give chizuk to the children, to find ways to keep the atmosphere positive. Try using contests and incentives. Find ways to cope. Remember, HaKadosh Baruch Hu isn’t abandoning us — He wants us to maximize our own rachmanus and chesed, and then we’ll be able to see open chasadim from Him.”
It’s a recurring theme in his shmuessen: Why, Rav Binyamin asks again and again, does one need to daven? After all, a Jew believes that all that Hashem does is for the best. So why petition Hashem for our own desires? And he explains: True, everything Hashem does is for the best, but we can ask that He channel His good through compassion and not, chalilah, through suffering or illness. That is the avodah of tefillah.
When people approach him for a brachah, the Mashgiach will say, “Your tefillah is more important.”
Keep It Fresh
In Kislev of last year, the sun dimmed over the Mir Yeshivah with the passing of the venerated mashgiach, Rav Aharon Chodosh. Rav Aharon’s approach, which combined firmness and love, was different from Rav Binyamin’s, but already in Rav Binyamin’s hesped for his uncle, it was evident that he was finding a common denominator.
“The Mashgiach gave us all vitality,” he said. “Don’t stop, don’t delay, just continue onward with a frishkeit (freshness).”
Anyone standing next to Rav Binyamin when he heard the talk about him being officially appointed as mashgiach noticed him murmuring: “Let it not harm me, let it not harm me.” Later, one of the talmidim dared ask what that was all about. “I davened that I would succeed in doing only good in this job, without any ego or arrogance,” he explained.
Before his appointment as mashgiach of the Mir, Rav Binyamin had served as the menahel ruchani for the yeshivah ketanah Mishkan Yisrael, and he now juggles both responsibilities. He says that beyond the hakaras hatov that he has for the place that hired him when he was so young, “How can I give up having a positive influence on the young bochurim?”
Just like Mir disseminates its spiritual and material resources to the masses — not only to the students registered officially with the yeshivah — likewise, bochurim from the entire yeshivah world, from Brisk to Kiryat Malachi, come to the Mashgiach’s house for the Shabbos night seudah. There are a limited number of places given to anyone who registers on a certain day at a certain time with the Rebbetzin. Yet every Friday night, the Mashgiach always comes home with another two or three bochurim who are not on the list.
“My grandfather, Rav Eliezer Yehuda Finkel, opened a yeshivah with a minyan of students,” the Mashgiach told me. “At the time, there was only a handful of bnei Torah, yet soon someone else opened a yeshivah and then another one, and competition began. But anyone who was doing it l’Sheim Shamayim was happy to see each new yeshivah open. My zeide, who was considered one of the elder roshei yeshivah at the time, would come to a rosh yeshivah who had opened a ‘competing’ yeshivah and say, ‘You should know that a yeshivah is a great expense, it’s not simple. Here, take some money.’”
For Rav Binyamin, like for his zeide, it’s about raising talmidim, no matter where they learn and which yeshivah they’re enrolled in. They are all his students, and when they get married, they’ll all get “chocolate for coffee with your wife.”
Your Son’s a Rebbe Rav Binyamin came to the Mir — his home base — after learning in Kamenitz as a teenager. He still quotes his eighth-grade teacher, Rav Zundel Kroizer, whom he considers a master pedagogue. Reb Zundel was perhaps ahead of his time — and he taught Rav Binyamin by example what good chinuch is: “You have to find the unique thing about each boy, something he has that others don’t. If you pinpoint his uniqueness, you’ll surely succeed with him.”
Once in the Mir, Rav Binyamin developed a close relationship with the Rosh Yeshivah Rav Chaim Shmuelevitz ztz”l (his great-uncle by marriage — Rav Chaim married Rav Leizer Yehudah’s daughter, who was the sister of his grandfather Rav Chaim Zev). His day revolved around Rav Chaim, who treasured his young student and relative. There are those who say it was Rav Chaim Shmuelevitz who coined the nickname “Binyamin Hatzaddik” due to his nephew’s impeccable character and humility. Today, so many years later, in almost every shmuess or vaad, the Mashgiach will mention him — “the Rebbe Rav Chaim said…”
Rav Binyamin also learned under Rosh Yeshivah Rav Nochum Partzovitz (Rav Chaim’s son-in-law) and considered him his rebbi muvhak.
Rav Binyamin entered the Mirrer beis medrash as a bochur, and he’s never left. In his eyes, he was and remains a “yungerman in the Mir.” Even now, as mashgiach, he still makes sure to keep to the yeshivah schedule and learns the same masechta the yeshivah is studying. But he draws on spiritual influences and practices from a wide range of sources.
Rav Aryeh ztz”l once related that when his son was a bochur, just starting out in yeshivah gedolah, Kamenitz rosh yeshivah Rav Asher Lichtenstein approached him and said worriedly, “Binyamin is becoming a rebbe.”
“What do you mean?” Rav Aryeh asked.
Rav Lichtenstein explained: The teenaged Binyamin was davening for extended periods, and bochurim were starting to put down kvittlach at his table.
“I’m not such a Litvak,” Rav Aryeh reassured Rav Lichtenstein. “Nu, so what, they told me that my son is going off, chalilah? No. That he’s becoming a rebbe? Nu Nu. Now, decades later, look at what a rebbe he’s become.”
Rav Binyamin has the ability to draw some spiritual benefit from every beis medrash, chassidish and litvish, while staying true to the traditions of his fathers. For many years, he was close to the Beis Yisrael of Gur. There was always a kettle of hot water in the Beis Yisrael’s home, and those with a close relationship were invited to drink a cup of tea with him. It was a gesture to anyone the Rebbe appreciated and wanted to speak to. Rav Binyamin, for his part, drank many cups of tea with the Rebbe.
Rav Binyamin’s openness and willingness to go anywhere a Jew wants to learn Torah has endeared him to many different communities around Eretz Yisrael. Once, Rav Binyamin was walking with his father when a Sephardic Jew approached them, kissing Rav Binyamin’s hand and asking for a brachah. Rav Binyamin was uncomfortable and motioned to the man that it would be more fitting for him to approach Rav Aryeh.
“Mechilah, excuse me,” the man replied, “first I honor the rabbanim of my community, who lead us and gives us Torah classes.” This Jew was absolutely certain that Rav Binyamin, who during those years gave shiurim in the Moussayof shul in Jerusalem’s Bukharian neighborhood, was surely a member of the Eidot Hamizrach.
His talmidim relate that he never gets angry — except for one time. It was in the hallway of the Mishkan Yisrael yeshivah ketanah, where he serves as the menahel ruchani. Rav Binyamin heard a bochur hurling a derogatory epithet at a Sephardi bochur.
Rav Binyamin went over to the boy, and in a most uncharacteristic fashion, he instructed him loudly to go to the water fountain and rinse his mouth out from the toxic words he had used.
Rav Binyamin has had his share of personal suffering, including losing his wife, Rebbetzin Mina, in 2016. (In 2018, he got remarried to Mrs. Rochel Davis.) People in crisis know he not only hears them but can really empathize.
On Lag B’omer last year, while his sons were just reaching the tziyun, Rav Binyamin received the news of the terrible deaths of what would later be learned to be 45 pure souls. He broke down with his sefer Tehillim and wept for hours.
Afterward, he began the rounds of the homes of the aveilim. He went from parents to children, to bereaved mothers and widows. In one home, where the bereaved family was mourning a young boy whom he has no personal connection to, he was shocked to see a picture of himself hanging in the 13-year-old’s room. He had no idea how wide his influence was.
The same caring and compassion that helped comfort the families is actually there in everything he does. His words always have an apologetic undertone, as if he doesn’t want to be a bother. At the levayah of his father, and then of his wife, he was completely shattered, yet stayed focused on making sure that the ceremony and hespedim would be short and that no one should suffer from the heat. A few times during his hesped, despite his own grief, he pleaded with the crowd to drink. Even then, he was focused on the other person.
Fixing Ourselves
The two bareheaded youths who walked down on the Yerushalmi street didn’t look like they’d be interested in a yeshivah, but when they saw an obviously rabbinic figure approach them, one of the boys asked, “Kevod harav, can we have a brachah?”
Rav Binyamin blessed him warmly — then, as he continued on his way, heard the older one say mockingly, “What do you need this nonsense for?” Rav Binyamin turned around and asked the younger one for his name, and his mother’s name, and returned home in distress. He could not tolerate the scorn of one person for another.
He convinced some talmidim and family members to help him locate the boy, based on the boy’s name and his mother’s name, both of which were unusual. Finally, he located the family — a frum family living in a northern town whose son had strayed. Although the son was no longer at home, Rav Binyamin decided he had to make the trip up north to visit the family. That was too much for the boy — he couldn’t fathom how an important rav and mashgiach saw him as worthy of attention and love. Today, he’s an avreich who spends his days learning Torah.
A similar dynamic unfolded when, at a simchah, the Mashgiach showered a non-observant waiter with care, concern, and compliments. The waiter was so moved by Rav Binyamin’s genuine love that he eventually landed in yeshivah.
It’s this untainted love, free of pettiness or self-interest, that he tries to nurture in his students. He speaks openly about the jealousy we feel even toward those who are our real, genuine friends. “You see it when someone does a shidduch and when you ask who the other side is, if the answer is ‘a simple person from out of town,’ then we’re happy and give him heartfelt brachos,” the Mashgiach quips, “but if the mechutan is a distinguished rosh yeshivah, or a famous or wealthy person, oooohhh, then our blood starts to boil underneath our smiles and mazal tovs. We might even be angry at the shadchan for not suggesting it to us.”
Rav Binyamin begs us not to go there. “A person who lives this way will never be happy. He’ll have a bitter life, distant from Hashem, because in the end, it’s all one big lack of emunah. If a person would know that everything is from Him, and for his benefit, he would want even for the other person to be blessed with good, and when he davens for himself to have good, he should daven that it should be good for the other person as well.”
As deep and caring as he is, Rav Binyamin is also known for his sharp sense of humor.
I actually wondered aloud about the unusual combination of a talmid chacham and baal mussar who always seems to have a punchline at the ready. He laughed at the question. “You know, I really should be sad, because I’m so far from what I aspire to be, and I look at myself, and I see how much I need a tikkun.”
And then Rav Binyamin continued with an honest revelation:
“I merited to grow up under my father. He gave us a strong childhood chinuch, but there was also a tremendous simchas hachayim. You have no idea in what kind of poverty we were raised. I can’t figure out how he covered his monthly expenses, but he never showed us any worry, only simchah. Everyone has childhood experiences, and part of mine was to see a leaky ceiling all winter and to fill up buckets in the dining room — and to feel happiness.
“That was all part of our chinuch — to live with emunah and bitachon, to live with hope,” he continued. “The Alter of Slabodka would quote the baalei mussar who said about a person who walks around with a sour face: ‘You are a bor b’reshus harabbim! Just because it’s bad for you, now anyone who sees you also feels bad.’”
Rav Binyamin is quiet for a minute, then tells me his secret: “You want to learn one thing from me? So this is it: I don’t give up on myself — I always have hope that I can do better. That’s what you can learn that from me — to hope and believe that you can rise higher and instead of wallowing in self-pity, to actually correct what needs fixing. You can do it — we all can.”
All credit goes to https://barukhhashem.neocities.org/
Reuven's followers ^^^
I used to be a follower of Yaron Reuven, a con man and charlatan (though he does believe what he says) who essentially leads a cult of very close-minded cult-followers who accept every baseless claim he makes about the Torah (I know because I was one of them). His entire carreer is just a humongous conglomeration of unsubstantiated claims. What's funnier is that he makes a big deal about him always telling the truth, and in simple terms, and about always linking sources to devrei Torah, and yet never leaves any citations for the lies he makes up. I wonder why? He also has a large cult following of people I call "cult apologetics" that always make comments to his critics along the lines of "He is a wonderful servent of HaShem how dare you speak Lashon HaRa about him!" These comments never really argue anything, but merely claim falsely that the critic is committing lashon hara. Let the debunk begin.
One claim that already discredits him to a huge, huge degree is that he slandered Rabbi Sacks (I await his appearance in olam haba) by claiming that he said that yetzias Mitzraim was a parable. Of course this is unsubstantiated. And this is the basis on which he claims Sacks to be a "heretic". But even if he did say that yetzias Mitzraim was a parable, he would still not be a "heretic who deserves to die." At some point he "apologized", saying that he might not have been right, but then he slandered Sacks again by claiming that he was a heretic for other reasons, such as him supposedly saying that Chava was a protitute[1]; he did not say that, but even if he did, he would not be a "heretic who deserves to die." In the same "apology", he said that he might not have been right when he slandered Natan Slifkin, saying he was put in cherem. The "apology" video was also titled "Apologies to Rashaim."
One of his favorite topics is on the supposed horribleness of masturbation, saying that masturbation is equivalent to murdering 300,000,000 people[2], which is 3 * 10 * 10 * 10 * 10 * 10 * 10 * 10 * 10. So masturbation is equal to the holocaust, times 50, wow. He obviously never provides any citation to this claim, nor is this supported in the slightest by the Torah. I could go on for ages showing how mind-bogglingly ridiculous this claim is. The reason he says this, I believe, is because on average, when one masturbates, they kill that many sperms. But even when one has legitimate sex, only one sperm actually fertilizes the egg. By this logic, having sex of any kind should be the worst sin in the Torah.
He also has this cute little blacklist of the "erev rav" rabbis that are supposedly heritcal and deserve to die. This list mainly is comprised of people he merely disagrees about on minor issues. Natan Slifkin, who I very much like (but he has some ideas I disagree with and plan to criticize), but has very heavily [and rightfully] bashed Yaron Reuven for his ridiculous claims he makes (you really should read about Reuven on rationalistjudaism.com for further debunks). This is the reason that Reuven added him to the blacklist, despite Slifkin not being heretical or wicked. Reuven has also often falsely copyright-striked critics that fall under fair-use (like Slifkin), which is illegal, and yet Jews [and gentiles] are obligated to keep the "law of the land." Hmmmm...
He even slandered the entire Jewish nation by claiming that the holocaust was caused directly by the Jews' sins[4]. I don't see why he said this lie, as it seems like an unpleasant fantasy to believe in. Jews are obligated to always give someone the benefit of the doubt in a situation like this, so why does he lie to make the Jews seem more guilty than they are? Hmmmm...
Like many con men like him, he pretends that he is this contrarian rebel from the EVIL authority, who has this big conspiracy to do X, and that he is the real Y, and the other Y's are just lying to make money. Ben Davidson, a prime example, pretends he is this contrarian rebel from the EVIL scientists, who have this big conspiracy for G-d knows what, and that he is the real scientist, and all the other scientists are just lying to make money. Both Reuven and Davidson are just random dudes who completely ignore the consensus of the actual legitimate authorities from their field. The reason that these con men do not hold the view of the consensus from their field is that being a contrarian rebel is a nice narrative; but really, they are just false authorities. There's a pretty good reason that virtually every legitimate authority in their fields reject their claims: it's because they're con men. There was a pretty good reason that many rabbis signed a letter condemning him.
Now I will discuss 99% of how his followers respond to criticism, because they almost always say the same several things, shown in the above image. They usually just say that the critic is an evil heretic who deserves to die (one of them said the following on a video exposing Reuven: "Thanks to rabbi Yaaron Reuven's list of kofrim, I now have some extra reading material! *condescending emoji* *condescending emoji*"). Often they say the following (this example is from a real YouTube comment): "Rabbi Yaron Reuven speaks only Emet with sources [wrong] as well as [fake] Rabbi Yosef Mizrachi, great [fake] rabbis !!!" As you see, this, I believe, is the fallacy from assertion, as no evidence or even real arguments were given. They almost always just restort to lazily calling it heresy, or calling the critic a rasha, using a thought-terminating cliche. To illustrate the invalid nature of their argument, simply respond "No! YOU'RE the heretic!" Another common thing they say is that criticizing him is "lashon hara." There are many ways in which it is not, but to address merely one, all the information the critics use has been publicly put on the internet, by Reuven himself. Lashon hara involves speaking things about another that are not public already. Anyway, if you wish to read these comments (be warned, however, that these are some really, really, stupid comments), click here.
I sure hope Reuven sees this article; I wonder what drivel he would say... I also, as of now, do not have very accessible contact information on this website, so he would have to leave a comment, to which I would reply something snarky. Anyway, I'll probably debunk Yosef "Reuven on steroids" Mizrachi, who Reuven associates with, soon (whom I was a supporter of for approximately four hours, until I saw a debunk of him), but with him, every sentence he says contains, on average, three ridiculous unsubstantiated claims. He's truly something else... On another note, I hope this article was humorous for you and may Hashem bless you!
